We have some bad news to report. One of the safeguards on the nuclear device is a sattelite tracking mechanism active when the bomb is active. The tracking device came active for a 2-minute window this afternoon. This means that the bomb is active. What is most unusual is that the bomb was neither in the PRRP, New Crimea, nor the HEO. Instead, it was near the HEO-ASFE border, on the ASFE's side. Obviously, Trotsky decided to take a round-about way. We alerted the ASFE, but we are not as of now aware that they have located the weapon. We apologize that the ASFE has become embroiled in this. In order to insure that Warsaw Pact nations are prepared to deal with this, the PRRP is releasing classified information to all WP nations regarding the security precautions on the bomb so that it may be safely disarmed as well as tracking frequencies so that it can be quickly located if any of the tracking devices should come on-line again. Of course, we trust that this information will be held in the closest confidence as allowing it to non-WP nations would violate our national security.
Comrade Vasily Kirov
Posted by PRRP at May 19, 2003 08:22 PM | TrackBack